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I had two surprises yesterday. The first one was Sandy’s appointment has been rescheduled for late this afternoon. She’ll take the bus and meet him there. That way he won’t have to leave work early. Is it just me, or is there something odd about this whole thing? Don’t you think this is all strange, [...]

Continue reading about Paid In Full

He’s taking her to the doctor’s office and I’m about to spit nails. He won’t take his own daughters when they’re ill, but he has no problem leaving work early to take that little tart. The only reason I keep quiet is because with all this commotion, he’s forgotten about punishing me. I stood up [...]

Continue reading about Bundle of Joy…?

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Time ticks on by as I wait to find out how our lives may change. I’m worried about too many things and I don’t know the outcome yet. When he does come home, he looks drawn out and he’s silent. I warm up his dinner while he washes up. I don’t say anything. If there’s [...]

Continue reading about Raincoat

I hear the usual sounds that tell me he’s home. Except, when it’s supposed to be the crunching of boots on gravel going towards the back door, the crunching is moving away, towards the front of the house. I carefully peak out the front curtains and see him talking to Sandy of the large breasts. [...]

Continue reading about Be Careful What You Wish For

When he gets home, we’re getting babies in their pajamas. The instant she hears him, Boo just starts to tremble. Linus goes white as a sheet. They both cling to me, making it hard for me to stand up. I try to reassure them, that Mommy will take care of it, but they don’t understand. [...]

Continue reading about Dads Don’t Lie

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I suddenly notice that Boo is quite aggressive this morning. She’s a shy, withdrawn child so her behavior surprises me. When she uses Popo to smack Linus, I go over to her and say “What do you think you’re doing little girl.” I’m totally taken by surprise when she turns right around and [...]

Continue reading about Boys Don’t Cry

Sandy comes to call on me, to see how I’m doing and if I need anything. I was doing just fine until she showed up. Now, my body is tight and I’m nervous. I don’t much like having to be pleasant and doing small talk with the teenager my husband is sleeping with. Kind of [...]

Continue reading about Making Nice with the Mistress

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On the drive home, from the hospital, he tells me he’s very happy I’m coming home. I’m sure it’s because the babies are a hand full and he’s getting tired of dealing with them. His girlfriend must be too. I have a hard time sitting, and walking is a little painful still, but it’s a [...]

Continue reading about Make a Wish

I’ve been in the hospital for the past five days. When I was pregnant with Boo, I ended up with a fistula beneath my tail bone. It’s supposed to heal from the inside out. When the outside heals first, it makes like an abscess inside. This is the fifth surgery I’ve had to repair it. [...]

Continue reading about Time to Think

The hours slip by, my ears are ringing and I think of how much I want to sleep. The baby I hold is murmuring and the other one is having “tea” with Popo and host of other creatures, stuffed and imagined. I think of how I’d like to be home right now. Yesterday was my [...]

Continue reading about The Grace of God